What Parents Need to Know

The National Association of School Psychologists states that how adults express their emotions will influence the reactions of children and youth. Parents and teachers can help children manage their feelings by both modeling healthy coping strategies themselves and by closely monitoring their own emotional state and that of the children in their care.

 

Signs of Trauma

The Child Trauma Institute states that children who have experienced some event that has caused them to feel a sense of helplessness, powerlessness, fear, hopelessness or loss of safety may exhibit some of the following behaviors:
  • Sleep disturbance — They may have bad or scary dreams, talk in their sleep, have trouble getting to sleep or wet the bed.
  • Guilt — They may blame themselves for the event or for other things that happen, act out in order to be punished or display overly good behavior.
  • Acting younger — Children may become “clingy,” be unwilling to be left alone, demand attention or start acting immature.
  • Fear — They may become fearful of things related to the trauma — they may be startled by loud noises, sudden movements or being touched, or be afraid to be near strangers.
  • Fear of their parents’ reactions — They may feel guilty and worry that their parents blame them.

 

The Parent’s Role

According to the National Center for Child Traumatic Stress, the parent’s role is very important in helping children and adolescents to recover from trauma-related experiences. It’s not always easy to tell when a child is bothered by trauma, grief or depression because many of these responses seem to be the normal stages of growing up. It is important to give support to the child through open communication and emotional backing:
  • Acknowledge the seriousness of what the child has experienced
  • Let the child know that it is normal to feel upset
  • Reassure the child that he or she is safe
  • Maintain a normal routine and spend time with the child
  • Encourage the child to talk about what happened and what feelings he or she is experiencing
  • Try not to be critical or say things like “get over it” or “stop complaining”
  • Reassure the child that it is not his or her fault
  • Be consistent
  • Seek counseling for a child who continues to have difficulties

 

Referrals

When should a parent seek professional help for a child? This is certainly not an easy question. The National Association of School Psychologists states that if any of the following symptoms persist beyond a few weeks, or if any of these symptoms are severe enough to disrupt the usual home or school activities, parents and teachers should seek mental health services:
  • Disruption of peer relations
  • Behavioral problems
  • Decreased performance at school
  • Physical complaints with no apparent cause
  • Use of drugs or alcohol
  • Nightmares
  • Low self-esteem, negative talk about oneself
  • Lack of energy and lack of interest in previous activities

 

 

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